Silly Jokes
Boss Joke
Height Of Bad Luck. Your battery is at 2% and you see your Boss upload pictures of himself and his family. Wanting to impress him, you quickly comment "cool pics" but auto correct changes it to "cool pigs" and your battery runs out!
Father Joke
Little Johnny asks his father: "Where does the wind come from?" - "I don't know." - "Why do dogs bark?" - "I don't know." - "Why is the earth round?" - "I don't know." - "Does it disturb you that I ask so much?" - "No son. Please ask. Otherwise you will never learn anything."
Friends Joke
Three guys are stranded in a desert. By a stroke of luck, they find a magic genie lamp. The genie grants each of them one wish. The first guy wishes to be back home. Wish granted. The second guy wishes the same. Wish granted. The third guy says, "It feels very lonely here now, I wish my friends were with me…” Wish granted.
Cinema Joke
They threw me out of the cinema today for bringing my own food. But come on – the prices are way too high, plus I haven’t had a barbecue in months.
Charity Joke
I‘ve decided to run a marathon for charity. I didn’t want to do it at first, but apparently it’s for blind and disabled kids so I think I’ve got a good chance of winning.
Elephant Joke
Why haven’t you ever seen any elephants hiding up trees? Because they’re really, really good at it.
Office Joke
We have a strange custom in our office. The food has names there. Yesterday for example I got me a sandwich out of the fridge and its name was "Michael".
Lie Joke
Father buys a lie detector that makes a loud beep whenever somebody tells a lie. The son comes home in the afternoon. Father asks him, “So, you were at school today, right?” Son: “Yeah.” Detector: “Beep.“ Son: “OK, OK, I was in a cinema.” Detector: “Beep.” Son: “Alright, I went for a beer with my friends.” Father: “What?! At your age, I wouldn’t touch alcohol!“ Detector: “Beep.” Mother laughs: “Ha ha ha, well, he really is your son!” Detector: “Beep.”
Man Joke
Two elephants meet a totally naked guy. After a while one elephant says to the other: “I really don’t get how he can feed himself with that thing!”
Parent Joke
"I really don't know which kid I'm supposedly being unfair to, according to my wife, Thomas, Anton, or the fat, ugly one?"
Grandfather Joke
"Grandpa, why don't you have any life insurance?" "So you can all be really sad when I die."
Wife Joke
A wife is like a hand grenade. Take off the ring and say good bye to your house.
Husband And Wife Joke
A detective asks a woman, "So, your husband hanged himself?" Woman replies, "Yes, that is correct." The suspicious detective continues, "But why does he have all those bruises on his head?" "The old fool used an elastic rope!"
Wolf Joke
Little Red Riding Hood walks all alone through the deep dark wood. Suddenly she hears rustling in a thick bush. Cautiously she moves the branches aside and finds herself facing the big bad wolf. "Oh, Big Bad Wolf, why do you have such huge red eyes?" - "Go away! I'm crapping!"
Cannibal Joke
Why don‘t cannibals eat divorced women?
Because they’re bitter.
Single Joke
Q. What’s the worst thing about being lonely?
A. Playing Frisbee.
Teacher Joke
Why did the physics teacher break up with the biology teacher?
There was no chemistry.
Woman Joke
I’m certain there are female hormones in beer. When I drink too much, I talk nonsense and I cannot control my car.
Rude Joke
Man: Hi, do you want to dance? - Woman: Yeah, sure! - Man: Great, go and dance, I want to talk to your pretty friend!
This is a post with the best compilation of silly jokes that are ever written.
Height Of Bad Luck. Your battery is at 2% and you see your Boss upload pictures of himself and his family. Wanting to impress him, you quickly comment "cool pics" but auto correct changes it to "cool pigs" and your battery runs out!
Father Joke
Little Johnny asks his father: "Where does the wind come from?" - "I don't know." - "Why do dogs bark?" - "I don't know." - "Why is the earth round?" - "I don't know." - "Does it disturb you that I ask so much?" - "No son. Please ask. Otherwise you will never learn anything."
Friends Joke
Three guys are stranded in a desert. By a stroke of luck, they find a magic genie lamp. The genie grants each of them one wish. The first guy wishes to be back home. Wish granted. The second guy wishes the same. Wish granted. The third guy says, "It feels very lonely here now, I wish my friends were with me…” Wish granted.
Cinema Joke
They threw me out of the cinema today for bringing my own food. But come on – the prices are way too high, plus I haven’t had a barbecue in months.
Charity Joke
I‘ve decided to run a marathon for charity. I didn’t want to do it at first, but apparently it’s for blind and disabled kids so I think I’ve got a good chance of winning.
Elephant Joke
Why haven’t you ever seen any elephants hiding up trees? Because they’re really, really good at it.
Office Joke
We have a strange custom in our office. The food has names there. Yesterday for example I got me a sandwich out of the fridge and its name was "Michael".
Lie Joke
Father buys a lie detector that makes a loud beep whenever somebody tells a lie. The son comes home in the afternoon. Father asks him, “So, you were at school today, right?” Son: “Yeah.” Detector: “Beep.“ Son: “OK, OK, I was in a cinema.” Detector: “Beep.” Son: “Alright, I went for a beer with my friends.” Father: “What?! At your age, I wouldn’t touch alcohol!“ Detector: “Beep.” Mother laughs: “Ha ha ha, well, he really is your son!” Detector: “Beep.”
Man Joke
Two elephants meet a totally naked guy. After a while one elephant says to the other: “I really don’t get how he can feed himself with that thing!”
Parent Joke
"I really don't know which kid I'm supposedly being unfair to, according to my wife, Thomas, Anton, or the fat, ugly one?"
Grandfather Joke
"Grandpa, why don't you have any life insurance?" "So you can all be really sad when I die."
Wife Joke
A wife is like a hand grenade. Take off the ring and say good bye to your house.
Husband And Wife Joke
A detective asks a woman, "So, your husband hanged himself?" Woman replies, "Yes, that is correct." The suspicious detective continues, "But why does he have all those bruises on his head?" "The old fool used an elastic rope!"
Wolf Joke
Little Red Riding Hood walks all alone through the deep dark wood. Suddenly she hears rustling in a thick bush. Cautiously she moves the branches aside and finds herself facing the big bad wolf. "Oh, Big Bad Wolf, why do you have such huge red eyes?" - "Go away! I'm crapping!"
Cannibal Joke
Why don‘t cannibals eat divorced women?
Because they’re bitter.
Single Joke
Q. What’s the worst thing about being lonely?
A. Playing Frisbee.
Teacher Joke
Why did the physics teacher break up with the biology teacher?
There was no chemistry.
Woman Joke
I’m certain there are female hormones in beer. When I drink too much, I talk nonsense and I cannot control my car.
Rude Joke
Man: Hi, do you want to dance? - Woman: Yeah, sure! - Man: Great, go and dance, I want to talk to your pretty friend!
This is a post with the best compilation of silly jokes that are ever written.
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